Finally, Sonic has teeth again

Sonic, the beautiful blue boy we all love, has appeared in two film adaptations of his iconic adventures. They are the two highest-grossing video game films of all time and have immensely impacted our culture.

What you might not remember is that CGI Sonic was originally intended have a wonderful set of pearly white teeth, or “teefs”, thick tufts of realistic fur, as well as the most precious little round eyes you’ve ever seen.

The world wasn’t ready for Beautiful Sonic, however, and he was unceremoniously removed from public life like a Vaudeville performer being pulled off stage by a giant cane. Beautiful Sonic has been replaced by a dirty suitor made of pure human misery from a non-union animation studio that was later turned off.

The beautiful Sonic occluded Came backas predicted, as a major supporting character in the new Disney+ exclusive film Chip ‘n Dale: Rescue Rangers, not to be confused with the old TV show, Chip’n Dale Rescue Rangers. Beautiful Sonic has now adopted the nomme de guerre, “Ugly Sonic”, but it might be better to think of him as yet another Punished “Venom” Sonic. As if released by fate itself, Beautiful Sonic is now voiced by the great comedian Tim Robinson of I think you should leave fame.

My hope is that this leads to a competitive Beautiful Sonic cinematic universe to challenge the Sonic movies, leading to a kind of heated “Sonic on Sonic” action at the box office.

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